Train Toilet Training

Toilet training on the train is important if we want a pleasant trip without the inconvenience of dirty toilets or, worse, stinky clogged up toilets. It is important to remember that if you don't leave the rest room as clean as you found it, somebody's daughter, wife, mother or grandmother will suffer unnecessary inconvenience or discomfort. Do unto and for others as you would want for the women in your life. Furthermore, if each of leave it dirtier than when we entered, the next visit may be too much for you.

Important: If you find a faucet running water that will not turn off, contact the car attendant. If all the water runs out of the car, there will be none to flush the toilets. Water conservation on a train is a matter of comfort.

Two health notes to keep in mind:

  1. You are less likely to catch a disease from a toilet seat than you are from breathing the air of an ill passenger. If you are going to sick from an ill, fellow human being, studies show that planes, trains, elevator, classrooms and offices transmit illness from air rather than restrooms.
  2. Washing your hands when you are finished will accomplish three things:
    1. You will be more germ free.
    2. You will not transmit germs to other parts of the train.
    3. You will have a hand-towel with which to open the door, a hand-towel that can be tossed in the trash bin next to the door.
  3. If you have a foul-mouth, use toothpaste, mouthwash or soap.

If you make a mess and cannot clean it up, ask the coach car attendant to attend to the rest room. You can always say that you found it dirty. Only physically challenged people should use this excuse.

Toilet use falls into two categories: Standers and sitters.

  1. Standers--Lift the seat.
    1. Handrails are present on both sides of the seat. Simply grab hold with your left or right hands and use the toe or inside of your shoe to raise the seat. Or, you can use a hand towel to lift the seat.
    2. Remember, men, step up to the plate--this is not a long discus throw. Leaning over the center to allow gravitational assistance in hitting the bullseye will eliminate dry, stinking urine outsite the dartboard.
  2. Sitters--Apply a dab of soap to a hand-towel and wipe the seat before you sit down.
    1. While the human epidermous (skin) is a great barrier to germ transmission, it doesn't hurt be extra caution. And, it gives some peace of mind.
    2. If you refuse to sit-down on the seat, preferring the asian angle of relief, please raise the seat as described in the above standers section--toe or towel.
    3. If the commode does not flush completely after two flushes, contact the car attendant--don't use up all the water trying to move matter that requires greater physical force. If we run out of water we will suffer from either closed restrooms or stinky restrooms.
    4. To reduce the stench of the clogged toilet, the attendant may insert a newspaper under the lids to block the smell but he will have to lock the restroom.
    5. The main reason that toilets are clogged is the asian-angle sitters and/or waste-stuffers. The train has vaccum commodes which are design for the droppings to fall into and cover the vacuum drain so that vaccuum works completely and efficiently. Non-sitters adopting the asian-angle fail to seal the outlet which allows air to be vaccuumed instead of bodily waste. The presence of previous unremoved waste prompts the next person to adopt the asian-angle until the commode is clogged with off-center doodoo. If each person soaps, cleans and sits, there will be fewer clogged up stinking toilets on the trains.

Amtrak employees do not cause toilet problesm, stinking cars or locked bathrooms: We passengers are the cause of the toilet problems. Observing good toilet training will eliminate a bad memory for one and all.

Any mishap from the train rocking and rolling warrants a cleanup. Remember

  1. If you don't cleanup, the next person may not cleanup so that the next time nature calls you may not be able to use the bathroom at all. And, the air circulating in the coach cars will not be pleasant to the nose.
  2. If you can't cleanup, ask the car attendant to address the problem quickly. If you leave a stinky mess, you will travel with it for the rest of your trip for the ventilation system circulates air in the whole car.
  3. Remember, someone's loved one will be using the restroom after you. If we all do our part in the restrooms, we can rest more comfortably and assured on train travels.
  4. If you notice by sight or notice dribbles upon the floor, drop your hand towel after you wash your hands. Using a foot, move the handtowel over the offending dribble. Grab hold of a corner for safely and hygientically dropping into the trash. Or, use another towel pick up the first towel if you don't have a dry, clean corner.

If you take a quick armpit bath in the restroom, please take a moment to use a hand towel to clean up splashed water on the sink and floor. Remember, leave the rest room as clean as you found it.